Having Gift Free Bridal Shower

As we were approaching my wedding date last summer. A friend of my offered to throw me a wedding shower. While the idea of getting together with some of your family and girlfriends for an afternoon sounded lovely, I always hated the awkward part of wedding showers where you watch the bride open gifts.

The idea of a wedding shower where you “shower the bride with gifts” made sense in the context of getting married young, where you are moving into your first place on your own with your husband and you are needing lots of new things like dishes and home goods.

Where I am in my life now in my 30s, having been in my apartment for 7 years at this point, and having everything I need, I did not want to receive a whole bunch of things I don’t have space for.

I also felt weird asking family and friends to buy me a gift, when it would already be costing them to attend the wedding and typically also getting you a wedding gift as well (more about that to come in my posts about the actual wedding).

For the shower, my friend Sophie and her mom made a whole bunch of baked goods and we had a small group over on my rooftop deck for tea. It was simple, but lovely. We used table cloths, cloth napkins, dishes and some vintage teacups we already had so there were no disposals and nothing had to be purchased.

Although I had said no to gifts, Sophie organized for everyone to write down a recipe for me, which I was able to add to my recipe book. Her mom even gave me here top-secret jam drop recipe which I will cherish forever.

This was a total surprise to me, and was such a thoughtful gift that was practical, personal, cost nothing, and takes up no space.

If you are someone who does want shower gifts, there is absolutely nothing wrong with that! Maybe consider having a registry of things you actually need or want so you don’t end up with three set of bath towels.

However, if you are having or hosting a shower, but in a stage of life where physical gifts are not wanted or needed, I would highly recommend doing something like the recipe cards, or even have everyone chip in for a gift card to the spa or some self-care for the bride leading up the wedding day.